It is interesting times that we are living in right now as many people face challenges with their finances – how to generate income despite the perceived downturn in the economy, or how to manage limited funds in a different way. It seems like everyone, whether governments, big corporations or small businesses, are suddenly being called to become accountable for previous spending, debt management and results from investments.
I think the opportunity at this time, for us as individuals, is to pause and take stock of the financial decisions we have made and the results we are reaping, with a view to determine what our path forward needs to be. This is an opportunity to take responsibility and learn from any mistakes so that we can create the results we want in our future. It can be an opportunity to explore and play with new ways of managing our finances, so we can learn discipline as well as how to experience more joy and pleasure from what we choose to do with our money.
We can also use this time as an opportunity to learn how to simplify our lives by asking “do I really need to be spending all this money or doing all these things?” I believe there is a direct correlation between money, time and energy – adjustments in one area will reap benefits in another. So if you’re ready to make some changes to how you manage your finances get in touch to have a chat about how I can support you. Text 0212 4063 535 or email email@example.com
Communication is often a challenge in families and mine is no exception. My children don’t like me asking them lots of questions and can complain that I am not listening. Now sometimes it is true that I haven’t listened (I am human after all) but sometimes I haven’t heard them properly or understood what they said. So I can also get frustrated when I have to ask them questions or to repeat themselves so I do understand!
This week I had a great reminder at my son’s soccer training about who is responsible for what in the process of communication. The coach emphasized that it was always OK to ask questions and then he added that if the players don’t understand something he has asked them to do that it is his responsibility to make sure he is understood. He takes responsibility for not communicating his message clearly enough and needs to find another way to express it.
Immediately I thought “Yeah – it is OK to ask my sons questions and it is their responsibility to make themselves understood”.
However there is still the part about listening. If my children are communicating something to me it is my responsibility to stop and listen to what they are saying even if it means asking for 5 min to finish what I am working on so I can be free to concentrate.
So the lesson for me from this meeting was that it is OK to ask my sons to take responsibility for how they communicate and it is also up to me to be responsible for my part in the process by listening carefully.
So how good are you at taking responsibility for your part in a conversation?
- Do you listen when someone is talking to you?
- Do you get frustrated and upset when you are asked too many questions?
- What would you like to take responsibility for and improve in your communications today?
And if you need some extra support with communication issues you can give me a call/ text on 0212 406 535 or email firstname.lastname@example.org to arrange a time for a chat.
I have had a couple of weeks now where I have been looking at taking responsibility and what this actually means, especially regarding who is responsible for what. Here are a couple of key points that I have been reminded of over this time…
- We cannot change anyone else , we can only change ourselves – we are responsible for how we choose to respond and behave towards another person in any given situation.
- A clear sign that we are not taking responsibility is when we criticize others, blame others, or when we justify or make excuses. We try to ease our own discomfort by passing the “buck” when we engage in these behaviors.
The challenge is to learn how to stand up for myself without criticizing or judging others even when I am being judged or criticized. I am learning how to acknowledge and take responsibility for my mistakes, without allowing this to mean I have to take responsibility for other people’s mistakes or upsets as well.
I am learning to become more conscious in all my communications by noticing how I am responding – what am I thinking and feeling, physically and emotionally, before expressing any thoughts or opinions. I am learning how to be willing to listen to others thoughts and opinions from a place of curiosity rather than a place of defensiveness.
It is taking time and patience for me to change my old patterns and is still very much a work in progress. Sometimes I get it all wrong responding from my old unconscious patterns, however I can be more compassionate and understanding now as I can see it is all part of the learning process.
- Where in your life do you find yourself being critical and judgmental of others? Or blaming others?
- What are you not taking responsibility for in these situations?
If you find these questions challenging and would like some support as you explore new ways of being in relationship with others call / text Heather on 0212 406 535 or email email@example.com